IF I ever think of anyone’s passing as “just another death” then it will be time to leave my job.
Last weekend I was called into hospital to pray for a woman who had died.
She had been well until a few days ago so her death was a shock for all her children. But an even bigger shocker was that her husband was an inpatient on another ward.
I was still there when the husband was brought across to see his recently departed wife. He asked if I was the Padre and we went together behind the drawn curtains of the bed area, where he wept and spoke to his loved one.
And the words he spoke brought a stinging to my eyes: “Thank you so much” he said “for giving me a wonderful life. You’ve been so brave and so loving and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.”
Needless to say I was very moved. This death, like all deaths, was unique. Touching a unique number of individuals in a unique way. And the words of this man were spot on. Not just another death in a hospital.
But the death of a woman who had changed some people’s lives. So with sadness in my heart, and after time spent with the family and (at their request) praying for them all, I left the ward – stopping to say goodbye to a staff member. I could see from her eyes that she had been crying, so I hugged her and we understood the sacrifice and privilege of working in hospital.
She, too, had been moved by this death – even though she had seen many deaths in her time in the NHS. Thank God that she and I were not hardened to this sadness.
So if you see me treat any person’s death as “just another death” then tell me to get out of Chaplaincy.
And if you – nurse, midwife, medic, administrator, healthcare assistant – view any patient’s passing as “just another…” then well… you can fill in the blanks for yourself.
DAVID SOUTHALL Chaplain, Worcestershire Royal Hospital
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