TIS the season to be jolly - so the song goes. But Christmas is far from a jolly time for thousands of people up and down the country who find the whole festive period stressful as it shines an unwelcome spotlight on their personal problems.

There is a marked increase in demand for the services of Worcester Samaritans and the county's psychological services in the run-up to and during the Christmas period.

Michael Shrubb, deputy director of Worcester Samaritans, said: "Christmas and New Year is definitely different for us because the type of calls change and the number of calls goes up by 10 per cent. It definitely brings up all sorts of relationship problems.

"If someone is bereaved and it is their first Christmas since the bereavement, it brings it all up again. It can be the same for people who have divorced and it is their first Christmas since it happened.

"There are parents who don't see their children because of separation or divorce and grandparents who don't see their grandchildren.

"In some cases, parents who don't get on, get together at Christmas for the sake of the children."

Mr Shrubb added that Christmas can be a particularly difficult time for people who are on their own or are depressed.

"Then there is the issue of isolation. Christmas makes people aware of where they are in their life especially if they are alone. When you are on your own during the rest of the year there are things you can do, like go for walks in the summer, so that you don't feel so bad.

"It brings it all home if you are sitting in a bedsit on your own or you are an older person on your own receiving meals on wheels at Christmas.

"There are some people who are so depressed and isolated that they are not even aware it is Christmas - it has not occurred to them.

"People with mental health issues start to get panicky. Everyone seems to be making plans and they cannot. It kicks their self-esteem.

"Then there are all the money issues. Some people do not know what to do because they cannot afford to buy presents and there are others who go out and spend a lot and end up paying for it for the rest of the year."

Mr Shrubb, who manned the phones at Worcester Samaritans last Christmas Eve, said he can see all the undercurrents going on at this time of year.

"I am really aware of all the problems going on. Everyone is comparing themselves with other people and a lot of people cannot go out shopping because they cannot face the crowds. Then people invite people round who they do not like and cook large family meals that they cannot cope with."

His advice to anyone feeling stressed or depressed during the festive period is: "Do not put yourself under too much pressure and do not do too much."

He said people did not have to be suicidal to call the Samaritans and it is better to get help before it gets to that stage. "People need to know they are not on their own."

Chief psychologist for Worcestershire Martin Willmott said: "It is devastating if you have had a loss during the year and this is your first Christmas without them. Christmas is a terrible time for you. Everyone is being happy and reminding you of that.

"If you have a problem with crowds then Christmas is awful because there is no quiet time. You cannot get away from the very thing you are frightened of."

Mr Willmott said there is also an increase in the levels of alcoholism and self-harm at Christmas.

"There are more opportunities for binge drinking around Christmas time. For all those reasons Christmas is very stressful. The key to enjoying Christmas is to feel you have some choice - if you don't think you can make it enjoyable then you won't.

"If you are bereaved, it is not natural to be happy all the time. It is fine to be upset and be sad but remember the person you lost would not want you to be miserable at Christmas."

And those who are separated from their children or grandchildren on Christmas Day can decide to have their own Christmas together when they next see the children, he said.

The most important thing is for people to feel they have a choice to make Christmas enjoyable.

Worcester Samaritans is running its 24-hour confidential telephone service throughout Christmas and the new year and providing drop-in facilities between 9am and 10pm every day at its offices in Sansome Walk. People can also e-mail them at jo@samaritans.org and e-mails will be answered within 12 hours. The phone number is 08457 909090.