Who paid mum and dad while living at home?

Research carried out by Loughborough University and the Joseph Rowntree Foundation a couple of years ago concluded that young adults should be paying at least £100 a month to their parents for living at home.

They found that on average parents spent an extra £15 a week on “cupboard food” and cooked meals for their offspring, who were also making a big saving on rent, worth more than £90 a week.

We grew up in Worcester

The subject came up on our We grew up in Worcester page on Facebook when Jean Armstrong asked fellow members if they had paid ‘bed and board’ to parents and wondered if it was still the case today.

The vast majority of responses suggests that it was commonplace then and still is today.

Angie Sellwood posted: “I did and when our daughter finished sixth form and had a job she paid for her keep before she went off to uni.

“Yes she did moan (a lot) about it but after a term at uni she actually realised that £50 p/w with all meals etc included was a pretty good deal.”

Janemartyn Laidler-lloyd: “All part of growing up and respecting your parents. Life is not a free ride.”

Nicky Dorey: “I was on YTS, £28 a week and I gave my mum £20. It doesn’t happen everywhere these days.”

Susan Proud: “I had a Saturday job from age 15 and gave my Mum £10 a week.”

Jill Spurling Whelan: “I absolutely did! I was even asked for my keep when I was still at school and took a summer job! And later in life, I paid my mother childcare when she helped out – something I wouldn’t dream of asking myself!

Christine Baker: “I did, I think I teaches you how to handle money for future life as well.”

Pat Burke: “A quarter of my wages.”

Jill Evans: “I brought home £7 and paid £2 keep.”

Karen Edwards: “I had to pay £25 a week, my adult kids pay towards our home and bills now.”

Ron Bishop: “In 1964 my first pay from work was £5. I gave my mum £3 and I had £2 for myself – good times.”

Bernard Paul Gocher: “Yes I did, I remember how surprised I was when my mum asked for it.”

Nina Roscoe: “Half of wages to mum. My daughter also gave me some.

“I thought it a good idea to teach her about money and managing finances.”

Lin Holland: “I had to pay £5 a week. Was good to feel you were contributing too.”

Marilyn Portman-Taylor: “1966 was paid £5. And half went to mum.”

Vicky Argenbright: “£25 a week and that was in early eighties.”

Lynn Cassell said: “After about six months, my mum let me save up some money first then paid £10 a week.”

Wendy Drohan: “As soon as I left school I had to give my mom 25 per cent of my salary.

“Even before I left school I had a Saturday job and had to buy all my own clothes and toiletries apart from school stuff.”

Diane Noble: “£40 a week once I left college – not a lot but helped me learn the value of money and got me used to paying ‘rent’.”

Janet Lesley Dymock: “ I earned £2 10s and gave my mum £1 a week.”

Ali Draper: “£15 week late 80s probably earning about £90 week.”

Stephen Savage: “£30 per month in 1976.”

Sarah Jane Pitt: “No I never and neither did my children”

John Ratcliffe: “First job I had paid £4 a week. Gave my mother £2.”

Deborah Nugent: “My parents never expected it. I started paying on my own when I was in high school by choice.”

Matt Merrick: “£50 a week, 18 or so years ago.”

Mark Weston: “A day’s money a week, so as my money went up so did my keep.”

Claire Phillips: “Most definitely, It was accepted as the norm. I was also expected to help with the housework and cooking too.”

Rosemarie Sutton: “Absolutely yes – it made me appreciate to the value of money and had to save for what I wanted.”

Lorraine Cruickshank: “It felt good to be contributing towards the running of the household. Recently I mentioned it to young family members who thought it was extremely strange!”

Kevin Bellamy: “Paid half my wages, picked up £40 in late 70s.”

Julia Knight: “It’s only right. You become a working adult, that goes with learning to pay your way in life.”

Jackie Robinson Jones: “We called it housekeeping. But it wasn’t much. My kids paid theirs too. Never big amounts but like me they learned to pay their way. I didn’t take money while they were college though.”

Susan Cripps: “Certainly did. I got paid £4 10s on a Friday. My mum took £2.”

Some parents used the money as a way of giving their children a small boost to help them on their way.

Toni Dunn: “I read a post a while ago now where some parents charged their children a considerable amount to live at home when they came of age and was working etc.

“They took half the money and put it towards the cost of the kid living at home and the other half in a savings pot for them as a surprise for when they actually fled the nest.”

Susan Cartwright: “£12... Dad saved it and gave it all back to me for my deposit on my first flat!”

And there were others for whom a bit of bargaining came into effect.

Nicci Mckenzie said: “To start with, £17.30 out of my £27.30 a week but then I rebelled and knocked it down to £3.50.”

Hayley Jackman: “£45 per week in 2000 when I was 18 till I left at 21.”

John Lee: “£30pw when I got a job at 18 in 1987.”

Lisa Mountford: “Had to give quarter of my wages and I was only on a YTS. Saved money from Saturday job in Dolcis and managed to by my first car, £1,050 cash.Will do the same with my daughter as well!”

Debbie Edwards: “I paid keep and helped my dad do the housework on a Saturday while my mum was at work.

“I take keep off my one daughter living at home now. Life isn’t free and it’s only fair if in a full-time job.”

And there were those of us who never quite managed to budget for the week, no matter how well-intentioned.

Jane Waring: “Yes we did but by Monday we were borrowing it back again!”

Susan Ashcroft: “I gave my mom a least a quarter of my wages (they realised that it was not much, thank goodness) And then later on when I had more income I had the cheek to ask mom for 5 shillings by Thursday before I got paid. I always paid it back until the time came for mom to say..you might as well keep that. Yep what did I do.... ask to borrow another 5 shillings the next Thursday!”

The last word goes to Gavin Thomas, tongue firmly in cheek: “Yes, damn it. And never saw a penny back in equity when my mum sold her house.”

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